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Saturday, March 15, 2008 | posted by mahwish_rina i am disappointed in myself. i have done so many mistakes. uncountable. thinkin abt it, i feel like crying. i feel so ashamed of myself. i dunno. i sound so rude. i look so rude. i act so rudely. i dunno wats happening to me. y am i acting this way. y cnt i change? y do i keep on regrettin n never able to change. i feel like breaking down. i feel like im on the edge. i never wanna b rude. i just dun like ppl acting so good infront of others when they just ignore things when no1 is arnd. sigh. i hate it when ppl keep bringing up things i dowana talk abt. i hate it when they make me sound like im ungrateful. i wish i cld sink into the earth n never ever appear again so i don have to make n repeat the same mistakes. how i wish i was better...
*** well, had a okay week. spent my time mostly in front of the computer, watching kdramas, listening to fahrenhite n super junior. haha. watchin witch yoo hee currently. wishin my life was better. *smile* monday went to the amp workshp. sumtin happened, making me ashamed of myself. y dun i just take a step 4ward n apologise on their behalf. i shd have done that i tink. apologise. then went to kak yams house. slept over. tuesday, came home late. normal stuff. wednesday. went to snow city n science centre. hehe. talked abt feilunhai onthe way there. hehe. ohya. ppl, if theres anytin, u might wanna call me. dun sms, cuz my phone is sum kind of spoilt. well, had a great time there. played with the ice n stuff. i was cold. reminds me of istanbul. the time where i dun feel like bathing coz its so cold. hehe. sumtin happen. u noe i noe. hehe thursday, countin days for school to reopen. hehe. had to finish my hw n study for the tests. so many things to do but just dun feel like doin. so i just finish my homeworks. some amath sums are incomplete though. hehe. then aya came home with the pirates eye. haha. me n my sister keep on laughing. haha. sis said aya looked like the blind man at the int. *smile* friday, spent my time in front of the comp. had to make full use of the hols. theres no way i cn watch during the school days. so might as well finish my time infront of the comp as i am still able to. so today, i intend to hafal my fiqh by today. c how la. am scared if i hafal, i lupe. so we'll see. but atleast, 2 topics. *smile* so here i am infront of the comp. trying my best to put my head in fiqh while my ears r listenin to super junior/feilunhai/taylor swift/irsyadee/so much more. hehe. wish me luck! i just realized the exams r getting nearer. hehe. i guess life is difficult nowadays. but thet is what that make life interesting. right?   |
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